December 31st. Sitting at my mom’s house, surrounded by family, food, a nice big puzzle getting started on the table, and Ryan Seacrest on the TV announcing a lot of my favorite performers ringing in the new year with song. And I’m having a small anxiety attack.
2015 was a big year for me. I had a baby. I started offering songwriting as a service and was overwhelmed with the response. We raised over $2,600 for the new album. I finished recording the album. I performed and worked with some really amazing people. I have come such a long way since this day last year. So why does my chest feel like it’s going to cave in?
I put so much pressure on myself to succeed. The funny thing about my success is that I define it. Once I hit a milestone, I re-define success for myself. It somehow always seems out of reach. There are still so many things in front of me. Things I’m excited to try, places I want to visit, goals I want to achieve. And if I get too much in my head about it, it becomes a never-ending “to-do list”. My progress will never end. But, I don’t want it to.
So, today is about celebrating all that I accomplished last year. Today is about allowing myself to feel joy. I’m happy right now. There is no pressure to work faster than I can right now. I will create and share as I feel compelled to.
The funny thing about putting pressure on myself to do something is that, that usually makes it very difficult for me to finish the thing I’d like to do.
One thing in particular that I’m excited about for 2016: the progress of the new album.
So I made a video for you. Happy New Year! I love you!