From a Mother, On Mother’s Day

by | May 8, 2016

I woke up to the smell of bacon and a soft sizzling sound coming from the kitchen. I quickly rolled over as thoughts of young children attempting to cook flashed through my mind. I was relieved to find that my husband, Russ was not in bed next to me. Now that I had ruled out a kitchen fire, I lay in bed wondering if I should get up or pretend to be asleep until breakfast was brought to me in bed. I finally decided to head to the bathroom.

About 30 seconds after locking the door and sitting down, I heard someone attempting to turn the locked doorknob. Even on Mother’s Day I can’t pee in peace.

 

After heading back to my bed, I heard my baby from down the hall. He was babbling to himself in his crib. “I have to get that happy baby in my arms.” I thought. But how was I going to obtain him without being seen? If Russ caught me going to get the baby or changing a diaper, I might get sent back to bed to “relax”. I peeked my head out of the door to be sure no one was coming, then I darted down the hall to the baby’s room as quickly and quietly as possible. I slowly opened the door to find Ethan standing in his crib grinning from ear to ear. I scooped him up in my arms and squeezed him, smothering him with kisses. We then sped back down the hall to my bedroom.

As I was snuggling with Ethan, I peered down at Logan, my 3-year-old son. He had slept at the bottom of the bed near my feet. I don’t remember him there when I fell asleep, but he was there when I awoke this morning. My heart swelled with emotion. I am SO grateful to be a mom.

Then a thought came to my mind.

 

Mother’s Day isn’t about escaping from motherhood for a day of rest and relaxation. Sure, it’s always nice to be waited on hand and foot, but that’s not what it’s about. It’s not about sleeping in, silencing the children, or showering in peace.

 

Mother’s Day gives my family the opportunity to fully express their love for me both verbally and through sweet gestures and gifts. And, I love that! But today I learned that Mother’s Day means so much more.

Mother’s Day is a day to hold my babies a little longer – to look more deeply into their eyes and listen more intently to their words – to spend more time with them and really relish in the amazingness that is being their mom. It brings awareness of the wonderful blessing and opportunity I have to be a mother. My heart is so full of gratitude today.

I hope that you can find a reason to be grateful today and always. Never forget how amazing you are.

Happy Mother’s Day.

I was “THAT Mom” and Mortified!

by | Nov 18, 2013

I have a young daughter who is really into dance. She had a recital last week, and we had some experiences that inspired a song that I’m writing. (This story is a little bit long, so if you’re in a hurry, scroll to the end, because the message is amazing.)

 
So, my husband and I have 3 kids, including a 1 year old baby, a 4 year old with a sensory disorder, and the daughter I mentioned, who is 5. This particular night was a difficult one. My son was running all over the theater before the recital started. My baby (maybe some of you moms can relate) would only be happy if I was holding him and standing up. No sitting allowed. So when the show started, we knew we had a rough half-hour or so ahead of us.
 
I have to point out that we were not the only parents there with other young children. This was a young dance recital. There were other babies crying, and there were other young girls and boys who were playing on tablets to keep them occupied during the dancing.
 
Now, let me back up a little. Before the show started –as I was holding my moody 1-year-old and trying to catch my runaway son– one of the ushers, a small older woman, stopped me and said, “He is not allowed to run around like that in here.” Now, I don’t know what you’re thinking… but I was just ready to laugh and cry all at the same time. I looked her straight in the eye and said, “If you’d like to help me keep him under control and in one place, I’d gladly accept the help! Cause I sure can’t keep him in one place!”
The woman looked like she didn’t know what to say. And I walked down the aisle to attempt to catch up with my son.
 
Okay, back to when the recital started. We finally got my older son to sit somewhat still with the help of a tablet. We had turned the brightness settings as low as they go, and as I mentioned before, we were not the only ones.For some reason, another older woman usher approached us during the recital and told us to turn off the tablet. Mortified, I sank into my chair as my husband told the woman our son has special needs and that the tablet is far better than the alternative.
 
As I sat there, feeling completely helpless, embarrassed, and inadequate as a mother, I began to think of ways I could have done things differently. Should I have gotten a babysitter, and told my son that he just couldn’t see his sister dance today? (You should have seen his face when he saw her on stage! He lit up with bright eyes and a big smile. He even joined in shouting encouraging words at her from where he was sitting!) Should I have snuck in treats for my baby in a theater that said, “No Food or Drink” on the door? I thought, “All I want is for my family to come to this dance recital together, watch the show, and ENJOY.”I thought, “I AM DOING MY BEST!”
 
Then it hit me.
 
We are all doing our best.
The old women ushers were doing their best at what they were supposed to be doing.
My son was doing his best with what he knows.
The woman behind me who was talking about her personal life a little too loudly, was doing her best.
 
I don’t think there are many people who intentionally try to cause inconvenience or pain to another person.
 
And so, I’m learning to be more observant. To be more understanding.
 
The woman in the room who has 4 kids climbing all over her, making noise,
The grumpy old man who has to have his 2 cents,
The young punk who has an attitude problem and is always right,
The wild child who is running around causing mischief,
The person in your life who is avoiding you,
The person in your life who won’t leave you alone,
The person in your life who drives you crazy,
 
ALL of these people, are doing their best. 
So next time you’re feeling inconvenienced by the actions of another person, put yourself in their shoes. Imagine what that might feel like. Maybe you’ve even made similar choices before!Decide today that you are going to be more compassionate and understanding.
 
I can’t wait to share the song with you!
~Ashley Ludlow
 
 
Don’t forget to pre-order your copy of the new album! www.ashleyludlow.com
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